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johnpedley

Autopilot - when it kicks in


For some time I've realised that a lot of the things I do each day appear to happen automatically as opposed to me having a great deal of control over them. This week I was entertained as well as reminded of my own autopilot mode when I accompanied a blind friend to his barbers for a hair cut. As normal we met and had a natter prior to going for a walk and this time he asked if I minded walking him to the barbers so that he could have a haircut that he'd been wanting to have for a while. It was a lovely cool(ish) sunny morning so of course this was OK - I thought I'd get him there and then maybe have a wander around town whilst he waited and was serviced by the barbers.


We negotiated the obligatory inconsiderate pavement parkers and folk who don't control their hedges and whilst I had a few scratches from the overgrown shrubs, I'm pleased to have talked him and guided him through a less tortuous route to his barbers. As all the staff were busy cutting, shaving and spraying water on their customers' heads I sat with him awaiting his turn. It finally arrived and despite me getting up to guide him to the barber's chair, the lovely lady barber came over to him, offered her guiding arm and welcomed him by name to her establishment and led him over to the chair.


I'd decided by this time that I'd wait whilst the cut was undertaken so that my friend was not left waiting for me to return if I misjudged the time it would take for his hair cut. This is what was so entertaining and highlighted my own autopilot tendencies. At the end of the cut, having brushed excess cut hair off friends ears, neck and shoulders, the lady barber walked over to her counter and picked up the barbers mirror so that she could show my friend the results at the back of his head. A couple of steps back towards my friend the lady barber clearly realised the error and walked back to hang the mirror back up where she'd collected it. A smile covered my face with the realisation that had I been the barber, I would most likely have done the same thing. At the end of a cut it's normal right to let the customer see the view from behind!


My experiences of working with and alongside visually impaired friends came flooding back! The first blind lady that I guided from a car park to her library to collect her hearing books was very kind to me! We needed to negotiate several sets of stairs, kerbs and foot bridges and despite me telling her that we were approaching some steps she later stopped me and said with a broad smile on her face that when I told her that we were approaching some steps that it would help if I told her whether they were going UP or DOWN - fighting the laughter I realised that just because I could see the direction - it was more challenging for her! I loved her teasing me with this on many occasions and welcomed her sense of humour when she highlighted my inadequacies.



Likewise when I was asked to assist a young guy to build his confidence to negotiate an incredibly complex busy main road that was the barrier between where he lived and every activity that he needed to undertake. I stood like a lemon each time we needed to cross the road waiting for him to decide when to cross. Thankfully there was a central area which allowed us to cross one part of the road and be safe in the middle awaiting an opportunity to cross completely. I have to say that this guy NEVER made an incorrect decision to cross BUT on occasion whilst we were both standing on the pavement edge, him with his long white cane and me keeping quiet waiting for his decision to cross, a motorist would stop and flash their headlights indicating that we could cross. When this occurred I had to apologise to him that it wasn't his decision to cross as the motorist had allowed us to move. We would therefore cross and thank the thoughtful motorist. Thoughtful? This action by the motorist could also be explained as an autopilot reaction - let someone cross without the appreciation that they cannot actually see the thoughtful autopilot action. I asked him what happened when I wasn't actually with him and he told me that he was often sworn at but enjoyed waiving his cane at the motorist swearing at him.



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